Red dress - almost there

We are so, so, so very close to the end with this dress!

I had two fittings in one week. It isn't the norm, but due to circumstances, we had to squeeze in a second one. Why? Well, funny story. On the afternoon of my scheduled fitting, Barbara was with her daughter when someone rear ended her daughter's car. The car was towed to the repair shop WITH the skirt of my dress in the trunk! We continued with my fitting, but only working with the top of the my dress.

I'll be honest. I didn't really know how I felt about it. I was pretty indifferent. We made a couple of key decisions. The piping color. We discussed where the piping would go, but ultimately we needed the skirt for the full picture. We worked out the arm hole sizing. And also the placement of the zipper.

A few days later, I went back. This time I saw the entire thing for the first time. I went up to the top of the stairs of Barbara's apartment like I always did. Turned the corner and walked into her sewing room. That's when I saw it. My dress on the dress form. All I could do was say "oh my god" a few times over.

I.LOVE.IT. Thank goodness the wedding isn't too far away, otherwise it would take a lot of self control not to wear it around the house pre-wedding when I finally get it in my hands.

For this fitting we focused on the fit of the dress and some minor details. A few more adjustments were needed in the bodice to accentuate my waist (aka, give the illusion that I have a waist). I decided to change the fabric on the waistband from the skirt fabric to the silk brocade. There was just barely enough material  left over. AND. We measured me for pockets! POCKETS! Well, it wasn't an exact measurement. Both Barbara and I had completely forgotten that I had requested them in the very beginning/ Good thing she reviewed the contract. Lastly, we dicussed potentially adding a light petticoat to give the skirt just a little bit more oomph. This would also help give me hips, too ;) The petticoat would be an added extra, but at this stage in the game. I just need it to happen.

I get to see it all sewn up and a couple steps away from completion next week!

OK, I suck at keeping secrets, so here is a sneak peak....



I have no idea what we are discussing here.



54 days.

Previously:

Red dress: fabric and buttons

Red dress: muslin fitting #2

Red dress: muslin fitting #1

Milestone: Red dress

Red dress - fabric and buttons

I have been meaning to update ya'll on my Chinese dress. It has been quite some time since the last post (try almost 5 months!)

I was able to bribe a friend who is currently living in NYC to pick up the fabric for the bodice of my dress. Instead of mailing it up to me, her boyfriend, who lives down the street from us, brought it home with him after one of his visits. It took awhile, but I am grateful beyond words. I could have purchased the fabric online, BUT the web prices were higher than in store. Also, I wanted real eyes to scrutinize the fabric in case of any runs, tears, etc.

Barbara was able to find red silk charmeuse that was the perfect shade of red to match the silk brocade. In addition, she picked up some black silk charmeuse and gold polyester fabric that we could potentially use as the piping fabric. Now it was decision time.

Do I want black piping or do I want gold piping? Gold is traditional and looks more upbeat, bright, and cheery. The black is a bit more versatile and elegant. At the same time, I was afraid it might be a touch goth. Aside from the piping, do I want to use the shiny side of the fabric or the matte side of the fabric for the skirt?



Silk brocade with gold trim and silk charmeuse skirt fabric: matte - bottom and shiny - right. (personal photo)



Yay for fabric!! Now for one itty-bitty, tiny-weeny detail that makes the dress: the buttons. Specifically, frog closure buttons. It is one of the most important details on a cheongsam. But as I have learned through this process, is one GIANT pain in the arse.

You see, the buttons are generally handmade to match the dress. It is usually made out of two different colors, the same as the piping (trim) used on the dress. I don't know where I got it in my head that I could just buy them. Hang on to that thought for a minute.

At first, this is the button that Barbara brought to me: 

cord frog closure via Vogue Fabrics

Its alright, but not what I had in mind. This is what I was thinking:

personal crappy cell phone photo

Beautiful right? After an exhaustive search of Boston and the Internet, I was able to find just a couple of potential sources. There are a handful of stores in MA that sell them. The first stop I made was at a fabric store in Chinatown. You would think that I would have some luck. No dice. I even asked them if they could recommend other stores. Also no dice. I called around to local fabric and button shops. They had some, but only of the one's made out of cord (like the photo above).

I hit up the shop that I had originally scratched off my list. I knew they could custom make them. The shop owner informed me that indeed they could make them. But it would cost me. I was quoted $20 per button. I kept this as option in the back of my mind. I really didn't want to shell out $40 just for 2 buttons.

I had found a source for premade buttons from Hong Kong. I wasn't completely sure that the color matching would work out in my favor, but I took a gamble and ordered them anyways. I lost, but only $12. For $12, I received half a dozen buttons in red/gold shipped from overseas. Unfortunately, the red was too orangy and the gold was too metallic.

Next, I tried ordering buttons from the shop that I had previously purchased the fabric from. This would be the second time I tried ordering buttons from them. Like the first order, they called/emailed to tell me that my order could not be fulfilled. Their website apparently was not up to date. This was beyond frustrating.

I could have continued to try ordering buttons online and hope that the color would match or that items would be in stock. But decided to just have the local shop do it, since I could supply the fabric and ensure that it matched my dress. Yeah...this idea totally backfired on me. I went back to the shop, who then changed the pricing on me. They apparently when you supply the fabric and pick a color that they do not agree with, they raise the price to $25 per button. $25! HOW ABSURD!?!?!?!

I won't recount the fiasco, but this run-in made me want to curl up into a ball and cry. I contemplated having my grandma make me buttons. I contemplated sending out a swatch of the fabric to my uncle who lives in Hong Kong to see if he could have someone in the fabric district in HK made them for me. In the end, I decided that it wasn't worth any more of my time and effort. No one but me or a member of my family would miss them.

Drama over!

Up next, I get to see my dress!

55 days.

Previously:

Red dress: muslin fitting #2

Red dress: muslin fitting #1

Milestone: Red dress

Western traditions - nixed

Weddings, whether Western or Chinese, can be very cookie cutter. Jake and I are a strange compilation of modern with a touch of tradition. When it comes to our wedding, there are just some things that we are completely doing away with.

via life.health.wellness.

Nay to being married in the bride's hometown.

This is an outdated tradition. I think it stems from the fact that the brides parents used to pay for the shindig and she was leaving her parents home. It probably would have been a helluva lot cheaper if we were doing this in Oregon. Most of my friends would get to visit their families in traveling for the wedding and save money by staying with them. BUUUUT it probably would have been a GIANT pain in the butt to try and plan a wedding 3,000 miles away. And most importantly, there is no way Grandma can make that flight.

Nay to "Something old, something new. Something borrowed, something blue. And a silver sixpence in her shoe."

I am far too lazy to type out what each item is supposed to symbolize, but basically each is supposed to bring the bride luck. Almost everything I will be wearing will be new. I am still deciding on jewelry, so there maybe something old there. But it does not matter to me at all. I am all about the overall look, not fulfilling poems.

Nay to the father-daughter dance.

I can hear you gasping. Look, my dad does not dance. I do. He does not want to stress out about learning. I do not want him to stress out. AND I have always been a super independent kid. You are just going to have to get over the fact that there will be no emotional father-daughter moment on the dance floor. Silver lining; you get the 3 minutes to dance to an extra song at the end of the night.

Nay to cake cutting/feeding.

I am sure that there is a purpose and symbolism that goes with this tradition. I am a big girl and I do not need help eating cake. I can feed myself just fine. In the words of Jake, I am kind of a piggy when it comes to food. I would probably just end up eating his bite. I also do not like sharing my food with Jake? Or anyone for that matter. One last thing, we ain't serving cake. GASP!!!!

Nay to the bouquet toss.

Ugh, I hate this more than anything at weddings. Please put a giant bulls eye on me that screams "SINGLE". I went to a wedding once. I think there were only 3 single girls, maybe 2. I was one of them. I got up and went to the bathroom just before the bouquet toss started. Apparently, they had the DJ call out for me. OOPS, missed the whole thing (THANK GOD).

Nay to the garter toss.

One word: Embarrassing! Not to mention, we only have a handful of single guys on our guestlist. There are a few more but I am not counting them as they are in long term committed relationships. It is just a matter of time before they join the club.

Nay to the sweetheart table.

this isn't really a tradition, but I thought I would throw it into the mix. We have a lifetime to dine alone. I am too cheap to rent an extra table and pay for the linens that must go on it. We will be surrounded by family and friends. Neither one of us wants to be separated from any of them. Instead of a sweetheart table or a king's table, we will be seated with our immediate family. I think it is a nice touch, the two families joining together, dine together. Our wedding party members will be seated with their significant others and spread out with their respective friends.

Did you decided against "traditional" elements?

56 days.

Dressing the Women Folk: Flower girl

via igoyougo



via myhautewedding, photo by Cameron Ingalls.



via Style Me Pretty, photo by Erin Hearts Court

Tell me that your heart did not just melt into a giant puddle of goo. I cannot get over how freaken adorable these little flower girls are in their tutus!

I forget how this idea first crossed my mind, but I have to admit that I let it escape. Around Easter, I started looking at Easter and First Communion dresses for our flower girl. I had read somewhere that you can score a cute dress on clearance after the holiday passes. Unfortunately, we could not find anything that a) was what we were looking for, b) in her size, or c) at the right price point.

While perusing photos of our flower girl on Facebook, I learned that she had started ballet classes. After some research, I found that getting her a tutu was very, VERY reasonable (try under $20). BINGO! After checking with her mom, to make sure that she would love it. I contacted Etsy seller TutuRocks and got the tutu train going (haha, I made a funny).

Here is our tutu:

via TutuRocks

I cannot wait for M to wear it!

P.S. I confess that I thought about making it myself for a split second. Purchasing was by far one of the best decisions I have made this whole process.

57 days.

2 months

58 days just does not seem like enough time. Then again, I sat on the sofa and watched TV all day Sunday. What? I deserve a break now and then. Don't judge =P

Let's revisit the wedding timeline checklist thingamajigy I have kind of been following:

4 Months before the wedding

 - Book your florist - Well, she has not officially been booked, but we have been working with a florist. Nothing has been set in stone, mostly because Jake and I have completely different tastes when it comes to floral arrangements. We have been around the world in term of designs. Hopefully we will peg something down real SOON.
 - Shop for your wedding bands - DONE. I finally have them in my grubby hands. I owe you guys photos. 
 - Visit your physician. Get your physical examinations and blood tests if required to obtain a marriage license in your state. - Yea, I do not think this applies.

3 Months before the wedding
 - Send out your invitations - DONE! I think most people have received them. We have heard from folks in MA, CO, CA, TX, and WA. Strange that we have not heard a peep out of folks in OR and CT. Oh, we got our first RSVP yesterday!
 - Select tuxedos - Done and done. We (I) decided to go with suits. The groomsman suits are all in and half delivered. Jake finally purchased his suit over the weekend and will be headed into the store today to meet with the tailor.
 - Arrange for rental of items needed for your ceremony and reception - Leaving this in the hands of our planners.
 - Discuss finalized menu options and costs with your caterer - I think there is plenty of time to make changes.
 - Arrange transportation/ limousine service for the wedding party to the ceremony and reception - We are cheap and do not care about "arriving in style". The party will get there via our own cars. But we do need transportation for the guests to and from the reception. We want to make sure they take full advantage of the open bar.
 - Order wedding favors - HA. You people think you are getting favors.
 - Shop for bridal party gifts - Easy, peasy. For the ladies, we are gifting hair and make-up. For the gents, we are gifting their suits. I feel bad as the women do not have something tangible they can keep. I'll probably come up with something small and personalized. 
 - Begin any necessary counseling sessions with your wedding officiant - I doubt that our officiant is qualified to counsel us. But we should start planning the ceremony.  

2 Months before the wedding
 - Choose your wedding music and share your selections with your Band or DJ- Yeah...I need to get on this. 
 - Select a location for your rehearsal dinner and make the necessary reservations & deposits - DONE! I'm already drooling over the menu we picked out.
 - Confirm with formal wear shop that they have received all measurements of every male attendant - See suits comment above. The men will have to take care of the tailoring on their own. 
 - Schedule your alterations and final fitting for the gown - One should probably call and schedule fittings well before the 2 month mark. I have had my fittings scheduled since March. 
 - Schedule fittings for the bridesmaids and flower girl - Psh, they can do this on their own. I ain't their mamma.  
 - Make arrangements for your "Bridesmaid Luncheon" and other "Pre-Wedding Parties" -  Meh.
 - Order address labels with you & your future husband's new name & new address - Move and plan a wedding? No thank you.
 - Confirm your order with the florist - Yea...I need to get on this, too.

1 Month before the wedding
 - Design your wedding programs - Already thinking about this. I have a pretty good idea and it will be awesome.
 - Apply for your marriage license - I will give this task to Jake. If he forgets, I guess we won't be really married then ;)
 - Have a final gown fitting - Scheduled
 - Choose all of your wedding accessories - Um, in this day in age, I am most certain that brides have their accessories all picked out MONTHS before.
 - Visit your hair stylist, work on a style with your veil - Already had this taken care of back in May.
 - Visit your make-up artist the same day - see line above.
 - Hair & make-up done, have your formal bridal portraits done - Uh, sorry, I ain't a Southern belle.
 - Discuss and finalize details with wedding service providers - TBD.

Now for the personal to-do list:

• Menus need to be designed, printed, and assembled.
• Cardbox - I told myself by the end of the month....I have 8 days...
• Chair signage - do we even need signage? seriously?
• Welcome packages for out of town guests -I mean what welcome packages? No one is getting anything.
• Communicate with our photog and cinematog what photos/moments MUST be captured.
• Table numbers
• Seating chart - I had post-it notes with last names when making the invitations, now I can just use those to help arrange everyone.
• Super secret wedding stuff -  We have been doing a lot of things behind the scenes that we refuse to share with anyone, including our parents and wedding party members. We want EVERYONE to be surprised, enjoy themselves, and have a great time.
• Ring bearer pillow - so close to being finished
• Flower basket - also so very very close
• Signage for guestbook and other things.
• Escort cards

Countdown:
3 months
4 months

5 months

Meltdown at 5 months

6 months

7 months

8 months

9 months

11 months

12 months

13 months